This journey through the latest chapter in life without my life partner still seems like a bad dream at times. Other times, I am almost complacent. The good, bad and the almost surprising, weave in and out of the days and now nearly four months later in my untethered world.
Lately, days are full of laughter, nights not so much fun. But all in all, surviving and soon thriving is my goal.
I sit at my desk in my new office, once occupied by Des, typing in a room full of light and books and memories and files and family pictures. Murphi is stretched alongside the computer screen, purring softly. I peer out the window and see trees and sky.
What does Des see, I wonder. I feel his love here. More so in church, and even in the supermarket, where I reach for his Oatmeal crunch cookies and remember to put them back. Change surrounds me. Life goes on.
My Wednesday afternoons are taken up with a grief group conducted byt the assisted living people associated with Hospice. Went to my first one last week, getting lost looking for a streed named Westinghouse that is behind a Tire store off Telephone. I will go back again. Seems to fit my needs. The counsellor ended the session by having us share something humorous about our loved one. We all did and left laughing. How appropriate to celebrate his life this way.
He used to tell me, I'll miss you when I'm gone. Ain't that the truth.
So says Sassy
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